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What Is Self Talk?

It is something we all do. Aren't we always explaining things to ourselves, and making comments to ourselves? The real question is, what are we saying, and does it matter? It does. What you say to yourself radically affects the quality of your life, and your ability to do things effectively.

Are you using primarily positive self-talk or negative self-talk? Some of the things that positive and negative people say follow. Look closely at the difference. When you do, you will immediately see how these "mere words" can affect your life.

Negative Self Talk

Negative people explain bad things by internalizing them ("It's me again."). They consider them permanent ("It's always this way."). They generalize ("Life sucks."). When they explain good things, they externalize them ("That's just lucky."), consider them temporary ("That went well TODAY."), and see them only in a specific context ("At least THIS went right.").

"It's ALWAYS a mess when I meet someone new."

"This party is great, not like mine."

"This is fun for now."

"Well, THAT went okay, I guess."

"I screwed up again."

"This good weather won't last."

Positive Self Talk

Positive people explain bad things by externalizing them ("The weather caused it."). They consider them temporary ("That was a rough couple hours."). They see them as isolated ("THAT part of the plan didn't work, but..."). When they explain good things, they internalize them ("Life is great!"), consider them to be more or less permanent changes ("Now I know how to do this."), and generalize from them ("Things are working out well.").

"I've done well with this."

"I like the way things are going."

"This has become a great business to be in."

"That just went bad due to the weather."

"It was rough for an hour or two."

"The car broke down, but the trip was fun."

Why not explain things to yourself in a positive constructive way? You'll see a difference in your attitude today. When you make positive self talk your normal mode of operation, you'll see a difference in your life. One of the quickest and simplest ways to change your experience of life is to change the way you talk to yourself.

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